My Changing Body - Pregnancy thru Postpartum

How exciting it is when you first find out your pregnant.  The fun part of a growing baby bump just consumes your thoughts or at least it did mine.  It was so hard for me to imagine my belly being huge, with a BABY inside.  I mean, I have been on this earth quite a few years and the only thing I could have pictured was the typical monthly bloat.  

It was amazing seeing how your body can stretch out of shape and provide a little nest for your growing baby.  I had every intention of being the healthiest I could be, especially since I am older and knew how much more work it would be to go back to normal.  With that said, I fell off the health wagon at the beginning of the 2nd trimester.  I stopped working out completely because I was just so paranoid since I was high risk and had so many miscarriage before.  That was my biggest mistake.  It was also my 2nd trimester when I had a strong aversion to vegetable or salads.  They didn't sound good and it made me queasy at the thought of it.  So my dissent into carbs, meats and later into my 3rd trimester SWEETS!  Ugh, I did keep up with my water consumption, prenatal vitamins and tried staying away from pure fat.  I can say if we decide on having another baby, I won't be so paranoid and I will most definitely remember how much I put on with the first.

You are probably wondering how much weight I gained throughout my pregnancy.  I started out 10 lbs heavier since I was going through a fertility specialist.  A combination of the medication and being told to eat fattier meats.  Anyways, I started at 135 lbs and upon being admitted to the hospital I weighed in at a whopping 192 lbs.  Yes, I gained 57 lbs! Crazy!  By 2 months postpartum I had lost 35 lbs just from delivery and breastfeeding.  In order for me to get back to my normal weight, I have 32 lbs to go.  Man those Rueben's and custards that went down so easy aren't sounding so great now.  

4 months postpartum

With the extra weight, I have basically banned photos being taken of me.  Somehow my dad seems to sneak some in here and there.  Deep down the vanity makes me feel rotten pretty rotten considering I did just give birth to a little adorable human.  So I guess I will keep a few to record my journey.

Here we go...about 2 weeks ago I hired a personal trainer.  I only meet with her 2 times a week so the other 5 days are up to me to fill.  That can be scary but I have been doing some Jillian Michael's videos and walking.  I am definitely looking forward to seeing a side-by-side photo of the before and after.

Stay tuned.

Father's Day Weekend in Branson

My parents were able to come down to spend a week with us and continue their spoiling of Ethan. Since Father's Day was approaching we decided last minute to take a trip down to Branson.  They have never been there before and we wanted them to see Lilley's Landing, a cute little Resort and Marina on Taneycomo Lake.

I wish we would have spent more time at the pool than fishing :(

Chris got familiar with toting E around in the Moby Wrap one morning

The Taneycomo Lake is a cold water lake which is predominantly trout filled.  Which is perfect for fly fisherman like my hubs.  My dad and I aren't great with a fly rod so we stuck to the spinners.  The great thing about the cold water is no matter how hot the day gets, when your on the water it can be chilly especially when your moving along in the boat.  This also adds to the fog that has to burn off every day.  At night it reminds me of the show or movie back in the late 80s I think, what was it "The Fog" or something.  Anyways, it gives an eery feeling.

Morning Rays over the River

Dock at the Resort's Marina - Chris's drift boat

We decided to rent a pontoon since my mom is terrified of the water and the drift boat just wasn't going to work with her.  Little man loved it, he refused to nap and took in everything around him.

Getting ready to get on the pontoon

I think being on the water with his Dad will be a regular event 

Our last morning there we thought we should at least get the drift boat out and try for a fish again since the day before was no good.  The generators were finally shut down on the dam so the water was calm.  The day before the current was just way too fast.

Sam was helping spot things for Pops

Well, the fishing trip in Branson was a bust.  While we enjoyed the beautiful outdoors and relaxed, it was unfortunately an unsuccessful fishing trip.  I mean we tried from the time we got there, on the dock, from the rented pontoon boat, the drift boat but nothing.   So we refilled our tanks and headed home. Yeah yeah, I already told my trainer about it.

Danna's BBQ and Burgers in Branson, MO

We pass Bennett Spring State Park in Lebanon on our way home and my dad and Chris couldn't resist.  They wanted to make one last effort.   And as it goes, I didn't have my camera on me when Chris and my dad eventually caught one.  Figures.

Back home and exhausted, those 2 and half days felt like a week.  For Father's Day we were slow moving.  We all slept in a bit before indulging in a delicious lunch at Gordoz Steakhouse in Rolla.  Of course it wouldn't be complete without mounds of pies from A Slice of Pie.  Now the day is complete. :-)

Boston Creme Pie, Peanut Butter Lust Pies and a Lemon Meringue 

Slice of Pie Bakery in Rolla, MO

Oh it is so hard saying good bye to my folks when they leave.  I sure wish we lived closer.  Love you Mom and Dad!

Papaw, Nana, Ethan and I

I love you Mom and Dad!  Happy Father's Day Pops!

Doodle Day

I'm not sure what pregnancy did to me but I have been a hot mess since little man came along.  And when I mean [Hot Mess] I mean shirt wet, legs damp and fanning myself with gusto kind of hot mess.  After church this morning I had to come home and take another bath.  Ick.  What is the deal?

Well, now that I'm back home in the comfort of my A/C I did a little surfing on Etsy.   I came across a cute print that I thought I could recreate but with my own look.  Not to sell or anything, just to give me little projects in Photoshop to help build my skills.   So I thought today would be a creative day.   I am a self-taught Photoshop user so it takes me a while to review YouTube tutorials before I get to the final product.   Maybe one day I'll blow this up to a larger print and frame it for Ethan's room.  By then I'm sure I will have tweaked it to death.  

Break time, my show "Believe" is coming on.  Off to the sofa for some boob tube time.

Memorial Day at Nana & Papaw's

I decided to take Ethan back home to Kentucky to see Nana & Papaw, meet his uncle and cousin and my church family from childhood.  Last time we saw my parents was at the hospital when they came up to help out when I had Ethan.  It was such a relief having my mom help out around the house with cooking and cleaning.

My hometown is only about 4 hours and say 15 minutes from my home so I wasn't to concerned with Ethan traveling.  I knew we would have to pull over for snack time.   He really is such a good traveler right now since all he does is sleep.  Ha! I need to enjoy that while it lasts.

Chicco KeyFit 30 Carseat     Boppy Infant & Toddler Head Support Pillow

We made it!

It felt special having Ethan in the home I grew up in.  Nana couldn't wait to get him out on her swing in the mornings. The weather was perfect for Memorial Day weekend.  Pops and I went and walked the new river walk every morning like we did when I was living there while Chris was in Iraq.   

Its kind of funny now, I use to want to get far, far away from Kentucky when I was growing up.  I swore that I was born in the wrong town, the wrong state.  I knew I was meant to be in a larger city.   Well, I guess when you have lived in different cities, grown up and have a child your whole way of thinking changes.  Those small towns seem cozy and comfortable.  Like Nana's warm apple pie.

Downtown Henderson KY River walk 

We decided to take my nephew to the Audubon State Park every evening for a walk.  I have been coming here since I was a kid and it just doesn't get old.  They have these beautiful Peony bushes all around the museum.  The Peony is what made up my bouquet when we got married.  This has to be my favorite flower.  Just gorgeous!

Audubon State Park Trail

Audubon State Park Museum

And you can't come home to a Nana & Papaw visit without a fire.  It was a great evening for it.  It was cool and had been an overcast day.  This was little man's first fire and I'm sure this will not be his last.  I do think he was more fascinated with my roasted marshmallow than the fire itself.  One day little guy, one day.

What a great visit.  We got to see everyone, even my best friend from childhood Heather.  Wish I had of taken a pic that day, I must have spaced out.  :( Well next time Heather, for sure.  

The Joys of Breastfeeding (snicker, snicker)

Yes, that was a little sarcasm.  I want to start out by saying Congratulations to all your momma's who were able to stick it out and breastfeed your little one.  I say that because in my experience it truly is an accomplishment.

Please know you are NOT a failure if you have to stop breastfeeding.  Breastfeeding is tough in the beginning and for many women they are just not able to do it.  If you are capable of doing it and are stubborn, or as I like to say strong-willed, then my story may help lift your spirits and help you push on.

In the beginning, I struggled daily with pushing through it.  When he first latched on at the hospital, it just did not feel natural it was painful.  All that I have read stated that if it is painful then the latch is wrong.  Every day I assumed the latch was all wrong and after calling the lactation consultant to my room several times, all I kept hearing was "the latch is perfect, you are doing great" WHAT?!, Then why does my nipple feel like a piranha just attacked it and left it mangled.  I cried and cried every time I knew he needed to eat, which was and still is every 2 hours.   They told me to keep nipple cream on after every feeding and it will help.  I was faithful with this and truly believe it kept them from bleeding.

Before I forget, when you are incredibly engorged, I mean rock hard, in the first few days and weeks...pump, pump, store, store!!  Looking back if I would have stored all of that milk, man oh man I would be sitting with a pretty hefty stock.  Unfortunately,  I was more concerned with my aching nipples.  While pumping was easier at the time than him latching on, I just wasn't in the right frame of mind.  Pain really messes with your thinking.  So I resorted to cabbage leaves, ice packs and warm showers to help the pain of engorgement.  Let's be honest, the pain of engorgement is second fiddle to my poor nipples.  Take my advice though, save that precious milk as much as you can in case you need to stop nursing you will have a nice little stock pile.

Anyways, when packing my hospital bag I searched out the best nipple cream.   I am a big believer in not using harsh ingredients on my skin, let alone on a part of me that my child will have his mouth on and ingesting.  I read countless labels and finally found Earth Mama's Nipple Butter and decided to give it a go.  I highly recommend this product to go in any new momma's hospital bag.  It has many soothing natural plant butters, including cocoa butter gives it a food smell instead of an ointment smell like other brands.  They also have a baby lotion that smells heavenly, but I'll discuss that in another post on my fave baby items.

Earth Mama Natural Nipple Butter

At 2 weeks postpartum, I sat in the nursery and broke down in a full on waterfall of tears and choking gasps.  I could not go on...I had bruised and scabbed nipples and every time he latched on I had to bite my lip and beat my leg into the floor to absorbed the insane pain that I felt.  That night I told myself no more, I have to stop!  This was also echoed by my poor hubby who couldn't stand watching me in that pain one more day.  

While lying in bed trying to get my head straight on how I was going to do this transition to formula and if I could actually go through with it, God whispered to me.   God was leading me to reach out to the forums on the internet.  After searching for momma's who had similar experiences,  the screen on my phone was flooded with their stories.  FINALLY, the truth!  Pain doesn't mean you have a wrong latch, it just means you are breastfeeding for the first time in YOUR LIFE and it FREAKING HURTS!   Yes, Yes, I'm not the only one!!  Why on earth doesn't the lactation people just tell you "Hey it sucks and you will be in excruciating pain for the first 2-3 weeks".   Anyways, all of the other momma's were in a general agreement that if you could make it to week 3, it will get better.   Determination set in.  I wiped my tears and told my hubby "I'm doing this no matter what! Its 2 weeks pp and if I can take the pain this long I can last one more week".   

I am so thankful that God laid it on my heart to search out other mom's.  I made it to week 3 and they were right, it did get better.  It seemed like the pain kept dissipating.  It is now week 4 pp and I am starting to feel like a well oiled machine.  Sort of.   The pain is completely gone and I actually am enjoying it.  Eek! Did I just say that.  YES, I feel closer to him and I'm actually sad at the thought of weening him one day

   Awe so sweet!

 1 month old

My current plan is to nurse him until he is 6 months old but honestly I could go longer and may.  Nothing is set in stone at this point.  NOTE:  It is important to let other new momma's know that at some point, its different for every woman, but your breast will adjust to the milk production your baby needs.  When this happens, your breasts go down a bit or a lot and you won't have the engorgement like you once did.  Oh  and you will absolutely think, crap, is my milk production going down.   The answer is no, not necessarily.  As long as your baby is continuing to gain weight, then all is well and your breasts are simply adjusting  Be thankful your boobs aren't as enormous as they were after deliver.   With that said, it is crucial that you keep your water intake and healthy food levels up.   I try and take in 80oz of water a day.  Keep in mind, everyone's body is different, there are some ladies that drink a lot more.  If you are like me at some point after delivery your appetite might decrease quite a bit.  You still must force yourself to eat and eat healthy foods.  Skimping just because your not hungry will hurt your milk supply for sure.  Your body needs fuel to keep up.     

I gave this advise to my girlfriend who had her second baby two months after I did and was hoping go longer than 4 weeks breastfeeding than she did with her first child.  Her issue before was her milk supply just dried up.  Well after keeping her water and food in check, she later texted me said "hey my milk is doing great! Thanks!"   

Drop me a line if you have any questions ladies.  I would be more than happy to be a cheerleader for you!  I am forever indebted to those nameless women out there who unknowingly cheered me on during a time that many new mommas' also struggle through.   

It's time...

Where do I start?  Well I was due to be induced on Tuesday, 2/11.  I hated the thought of it being artificially jumpstarted.  So I scoured the internet looking for anything that would get the process started a little more naturally than pitocin  Forum after forum kept talking about how Primrose Oil vaginally and orally helped other women lose their plug or even break their waters.   Hmmm, it was worth a shot.

Rewind back to Saturday (2/8), 3 days before THE day.  I purchased a bottle of 500mg organic primrose oil.   I started Saturday night taking 1000mg or two pills vaginally.  It was strange and I had to do it right at bedtime due to all the pressure of baby it kept pushing the pills out no matter how far I wedged them up by my cervix opening.  Then Sunday and Monday I took 1000mg orally in the morning and 1000mg vaginally in the evening, so a total of 2000mg a day.  Monday morning at about 9:00am my plug came out.  I read about what others had looked like and yes I even googled pictures so I knew what to look for.  Mine however was perfectly clear and like stretchy snot. Yeah, great image huh?  This was such a relief considering I am RH negative blood type which means if the baby's blood intermingled with mine then my body would have been potentially trying to create antibodies against him, not good.

Uh Oh, My Water Just Broke
So, I was getting ready for bed that Monday night (2/10) and thought well if anything my plug is gone so that should help my water break tomorrow when they induce me.  I laid my head down on the pillow at around 10:45 I think and my hubby just came in from his night class and settled in about 11:30.   A few minutes had passed and I told him I was having strange cramps that started in my lower back and was moving around towards the front.  He thought I was just moaning about pregnancy and wishing this baby out and grumbled something and turned over.   A few minutes later I felt a warm gush of water and immediately jumped up and ran to the bathroom.  As I was running I yelled out "My Water Just Broke!!"  That got his attention.  He popped up out of bed.  I kid you not, I gushed water standing in the bathroom for what seemed like forever.  It would just not quit.  I finally just threw a towel under my feet and stood there and drained.  Ick!  My parents had just gotten into town that Sunday so they were sound asleep in the guest room.  Chris woke them up and scurried around getting our stuff in the truck.

Ugh, Contractions
At first I wasn't feeling any contractions just tons of leaking water so I didn't rush too much.  I started putting make-up on and getting my contacts in, etc.   Then it hit me, at about 12:45 I had my first contraction.  Oh the misery!  I did like I had read about and breathed through it.  That wasn't so bad I whispered under my breath after it passed.  Then it hit again about 8 minutes later.  Holy moly! 8 MINUTES! We are an hour and half from the hospital!!  Of course, I have read endless posts about how the hospital will not allow you to eat and how you can be in labor foreeeever.   So we swung into McyD's, which took at least 10 minutes.  By that time, I was contracting 5 1/2 minutes apart.  Eeek!  I thought "I am not having this baby on the side of the road".  My last appt I was 2.5 cm dilated and could have swore that by the time we arrived I would have been past the dilation for an epidural.

Low and behold I arrived, panting and puffing, only to find out I was still at 2.5cm.  Imagine that, I stressed for nothing.  Here we are, stalling out on my dilation and in pain.  So I did what sounded natural, walk.  Walk. Walk and walk some more.  I finally hit 4 cm and became extremely nauseous from the pain.  Yeah, I guess I'm a wimp.  That's when I screamed for the epidural.  Ahhhhh....now give me that popsicle nurse.  :)

I honestly couldn't feel a thing after that.  It was so strange, comforting but scary all at the same time. How on Earth was I going to push?  I couldn't feel any muscle to contract.  Found out right before I was to start pushing that they had me at a level 12 on that machine. Wow, not sure what that means but apparently its way to much for me.

Push, Push...wait, DON'T PUSH
The nurse could understand my concern for wondering if I could push.  She said "Let's start with a couple practice pushes".  Hey that sounds great, I mean I don't want to waste the docs time when she gets here.  So here I go....I am imaging holding my breathe under water and pushing a poo out.  At least that is what the nurse told me to visualize.  Hahah.  Two pushes down and she said I see hair.  Hair?!  WHAT!?  She said one more.  Ok.  Whoa, whoa she said, don't cough or laugh he's coming.  Huh!?  How is that possible I stopped pushing.  At that point she yelled for another nurse to  page the doctor.  STAT!  Did I mention she kept her hand over my girl to keep him from coming out.  Awesome I thought.  Two pages later, the doc came flying into the room just in time to throw the gloves and coat on like you seen in the movies and he was out.   All 8 lbs 4 oz and 20 inches of him.

Happy Birthday and Welcome to the World - 
ETHAN LEVESQUE!!

Proud Papa Cutting His Son's Umbilical Cord

The Sweetest Lady! Dr. Kristy McCall - Best OBGYN in Springfield, MO!

To this day, which is 2 months after having him I am still in disbelief that I actually gave birth to a child.  I mean, I didn't feel anything.  Its like one minute I am as big as a barn and the next minute I have a little guy in my arms.  What just happened!?   Well I guess I have the rest of my life to think about it now.  :)

 The start of many times of holding hands.

 The best feeling in the world.  I love him so much already.

It meant so much to have my mom and dad there to see little man in the first few minutes of his life.

It was a chilly day leaving the hospital in Springfield, MO.  They are really letting us take him home by ourselves.  Eek!

I'm officially in Heaven.  Ahhhh...

How Did I Miss January??

I had full intentions of posting last month but here we are in February, no excuse.  My little bundle is due any day now, so I guess I have been working too much trying to get caught up before maternity leave.   We did have a quiet New Year's with some sparkling fruit juice and popcorn shrimp which my husband has informed me that will be our traditional New Year's snack.   On a sad note, I think I was in bed at 9pm that night.  Gotta love pregnancy fatigue.

I was able to get out before the snow and get a little walk in hopes it would speed up labor, which obviously had no effect on me.  I should have gotten more pics but I was just trying to keep my stomach from ripping off my body.  Sorry, it feels like 5 bowling balls taped to me.  I did see tons of these little puff balls, not sure which tree dropped them but they remind me of the little poms poms you use for crafts.

I can't forget to add a couple of pics from one of my most recent ultrasounds.  As of Tuesday, little man is estimated at 7lbs 8oz and must be cozy in there because I'm 39 weeks and there isn't any indication he is ready to come out.  However, I am scheduled to be induced next week regardless, due to my age. Yes, I'm apparently old.  Oh well.  This foot though is constantly sticking out of my left side.  

Its a little late on this pic but thought I would post the belly shot from January anyways.  I need to remember to take another one in the morning for my 39 week mark before we have any surprises.

And since I am talking about pregnancy, I can't leave out my cravings.  Aside from the urge for strawberry milkshakes and Reubens (which I just found out I love), I stopped at McDonald's for a hamburger happy meal.  I know, don't judge me I really have tried to eat properly.  Anyways, I am all about smaller portions, especially now that my stomach is compressed, but when did happy meal fries shrink?  Ignore the fact that I have already consumed the fries.  I couldn't wait for the pic, but you can still get the point.  It looks like something I would have used to play with my dolls when I was little.  

Back to waiting for little man and drinking pickle juice for my wicked heartburn.  Yes, it does actually work and yes I found out about it on the internet. :-)  

Many Blessing!